I will never complain about Scottish weather again.

In the last week or so, Lacey and I have booked our flights for our end-of-contract trip. I can't even express how excited I am. Non-Korean food! Clothes that fit! No language barrier! For weeks on end! Eeeeeeee! So if anyone will be around Glasgow or Edinburgh between the 20th and 29th of September, let me know – want to catch up with as many folk as possible! That's in between consuming huge amounts of potato scones and Fry's Chocolate Creams mmmmmmmm........

So that means that in between teaching, complaining about the hot weather, and laying semi-comatose under my air-conditioner, I have a lot to do before my contract finishes on September 10th. Visa forms to be completed, an FBI check to arrange (including a rather fruitless trip to the police station) and a place to store my stuff while I'm back home. Oh, and a way to move the stuff I still have stored in Scotland. A small price to pay for such a great year. I have had down days about Korea, I think all expats do, but she's been good to me, and I'm really excited about Busan (and the beaches!) next year. And hopefully a little less time on the subway. :)

A couple of quotes from moody middle-schoolers:

I never start to dance before tomorrow.

I tried studying last year. (I guess it didn't work out...)

And, a 'gloomy' dialogue from Julia in Twinkle class, author of the knitting pirate story. This assignment was very open-ended so I take no credit for any of it!

Characters: Kavin – 15, boy, smart, don't have friend;
Jack – 15, boy, good at sports, don't have father
Setting: At the school. In lunchtime. In cafeteria

Kavin: Today, I am again to eat lunch alone. Why don't I have many friends?

Jack: Hello, Kavin? Why does you eat alone? Can I sit here?

Kavin: Oh, Yes. I always welcom! Friends are hate me. I eat everyday alone.

Jack: That's to bad. It's secret. I don't have my father. He die to some car accident.

Kavin: Really? Oh...

(They're crying)

Jack: So, I want to make many friends. They can make me fun. Do you want to me to friend?

Kavin: Yes I want.

Jack: Good! Now we're friend!!

The Pervs are OK

So my rowdiest middle-school class were talking about their Korean teacher in class today. I have shared quite a few classes with their teacher over my time here, and I know her to be kind and popular with the students. Still, I wasn't surprised these guys were saying that she is very strict and always hits them. And that (of course!) they are perfect students who never do anything bad to cause this. Then the instigator of the conversation leaned back, put his hands behind his head, and said '변태' (byeon tae), or in English, pervert. He was rather taken aback that I understood the word, and someone else started explaining that the teacher was always touching them for no reason. It was very obvious that they were joking, but my Western sensibilities panicked. This would be serious stuff back home!

So in the break between classes, I asked our Korean manager what I should do. She chuckled, and said I should just let the teacher know, and she could deal with them. So, right before the next class, I did. When some of the other students realised what was happening, the boy in question ran into the hall and threw himself on the floor in a hugely entertaining display of humility.

It seems that in Korean, calling your teacher a pervert is just part of the usual banter. Glad to have that one cleared up.

A Heartfelt Apology

Today, one of my cheekiest third graders drew a picture of me and another teacher and wrote 'They are kissing'. Suffice to say, we are not kissing. When I asked her to leave the classroom, she refused. Instead of attempting to drag her out, I went for guilt and told her that it made me sad and upset. (She wouldn't understand 'I'm disappointed in you' quite yet.) I thought she would run away after class, but she came upstairs for her punishment: completion of a rather well-designed discipline sheet.

What did you do? I do on paper. I drawing.

Why did you do that? Because I'm boring.

Is your behavior good or bad? Why do you think so? bad. Because I didn't do study.

If you do the same thing again, what punishment should you get? I will have another homework make ten sentences.

To your teacher,

To teacher. I'm sorry. Because you will sad. But I'm only playing. Sorry to study. But I'm boring to study for long time. and I did a lie. So next day don't sad at me. I will good at you.

ByeBye
from Sally

Before I forget to remember

As an English teacher and resident of Korea, one sees and hears amusing things pretty much daily. Here's some recent highlights:

Adult student asking what the difference is between 'sheet' and 'sheet' – you know, s-h-e-e-t and s-h-i-t.

Middle school student asking why 'motherfather' is a swear word.

Respectable middle-aged lady wearing a t-shirt that said “I love my hooker”.

Adult student explaining that she thinks drizzle is 'so romantic'. I guess rain has different meanings for different people.

My Korean tutor asking in a text message for my “girl (couple) friend's phone number”.

Two elementary students hiding in a balcony outside the classroom. They climbed through a gap about 8 inches wide to do so. Healthy and Safety?....in Korea? Hmmmm...

And an excellent story from another elementary student. The task was to write about a pirate who loves to knit, but she made it so much more creative than that:

In a ocean there is one ship. The ship, it is pirate ship. But there are very quiet. That time flow out beautiful song in pirate ship. We are surprize and go to nearby the ship. We are suprize one more time! because pirate knit sit on the chair. They see we, they're stand up and say “Welcome to pirate ship!” They bring some food and some drink. One pirate come to me and whisper “Help me please. Chief very love knit, so we're knit too. You convince my chief.”

We're going to the chief room. In room chief knit very beautiful cloth. We say “Why do you love knit?” he answer “It's beautiful” and “It make my hand doesn't steal the other person's thing.” We agree his answer and come out his room. We tell chief's mind. They're agree too so we're leave pirate ship.

Climbing, K-style

After work last night, Lacey and I went to the local climbing gym in Siji for some much needed exercise. We used to go in the mornings (well, lunchtime, but that's morning for us) but schedule changes have made that impossible for the last couple of months. Even though it meant a very delayed dinner, going in the evening meant we actually got to meet some of the local climbers and see them in action. Chubby beer-swillers they are not. Well, maybe not the beer part...

Koreans never do anything by halves. Studying, hiking, golf, drinking, school testing...it seems everything is taken further and faster than back in the slow-moving West. When a Korean likes a sport, they practice All the Time, wear all the Right Gear - and they improve quickly. The studying regime, and drinking habits are well known aspects of modern Korean culture, but they fit into a broader context than I first realised.

So I guess it shouldn't be surprising that every one of the 5 or 6 climbers we saw last night was of a standard far above the average climber at Ibrox. I can't say anything about their rope-work as its a bouldering gym (though one guy was practicing clipping in with a rope tied around his waist) but their strength and all-round athleticism certainly is impressive. It reminded me of a training article by Dave MacLeod where he talks about how a lot of climbers are limited simply by being surrounded by climbers of their same level and so they don't feel the need to push themselves. While I'm nowhere near the peak of fitness, I did find myself pushing harder just by having harder climbers in the same gym, something I rarely did during our quiet morning sessions.

But what about 'traditional climbing' and the philosophy that goes with it? I've accepted that I probably can't continue my apprenticeship in Korea, and I doubt it's something that would even have much meaning here. Nature and wilderness are not revered in the way that they are in the UK, and especially Scotland, so of course the climbing culture is different. While I can't imagine sport-climbing beating the elation of completing a gruelling multi-pitch climb on the Cuillin Ridge, it was a fantastic way to spend a week in El Chorro. And indoor climbing, despite its limitations, undeniably builds fitness and strength.

As we were leaving last night, our new friends told us to come back soon. And drink some beers. While climbing. Oh Korea :)

Got canned heat in my heels tonight

Sometimes it's hard to choose the best moment of the night. Was it dancing like a broken doll to Lady Gaga's opus 'Bad Romance'? Eating vegan chocolate cake with a wickedly creamy filling? Watching Lacey jump around a nearly deserted dancefloor and wondering what ever happened to Jamiroquai? Or sitting on the kerb outside the biggest foreigner bar while all of Daegu's colourful characters came out to play?

Last night was one for the books for sure. Our friend Cat had her 30^th birthday celebration, starting at Daegu's most fabulous French and Mediterranean restaurant, Dijon. Due to budgetary restrictions, Lacey and I were restrained in our ordering, but the food was delicious and the chat was lively. We moved on our favorite home of drinks in bags to start some dancing, which went on for lord knows how long. When we thought we lost everyone, we wandered upstairs and meandered towards another bar and the kebab shop. (Yes, Daegu has a kebab shop now. All the comforts of home.) Then we heard that a dance party with a group of gay guys was underway back at Gogo, and so returned to catch the tail end, and close the bar with whatever music we wanted for the next half hour. Lacey and I were regulars at Gogo when it first opened, and before it got really popular, so it was like old times to take control of the music and dancefloor again.

We then went to sit on the kerb outside Thursday Party: the best spot to watch the madness unfold. We met an Irish girl with her leg in a cast who told us the story of each ankle: the bandaged one was pretty boring, but the other was broken by moonwalking. A smiley Korean guy who just finished his military service sipped water next to us until he'd recovered enough to return inside. A GI joined us for a while, and asked if maybe we would be going back to his hotel, but seemed unperturbed when we declined. And a usually friendly girl threw her beer on a guy who probably deserved it. Eventually it was time to be driven home by a pleasingly sober taxi driver.

Animals in Korea

A while ago, Lacey and I went on a dog walk with the local dog and cat shelter. The experience was both fun, and emotionally draining. We haven't been back, and I'm honestly not sure that I want to - and I say that as someone who loves taking dogs for a walk. One of the things about Korean culture that I just can't accept is the attitude towards animals. I don't know what underlies this way of thinking, nor can I describe it, so I'll just say that I feel a little queasy when my students tell me that 'all animals are dirty'. This weekend, my friend and co-worker, Mark, went on another dog walk. I think he sums it up better than I can.

In other news, my parents will arrive in Daegu tomorrow! I know I never update this, so maybe their arrival will spur me on to write something soon... Hope everyone is having a lovely spring!