A Heartfelt Apology

Today, one of my cheekiest third graders drew a picture of me and another teacher and wrote 'They are kissing'. Suffice to say, we are not kissing. When I asked her to leave the classroom, she refused. Instead of attempting to drag her out, I went for guilt and told her that it made me sad and upset. (She wouldn't understand 'I'm disappointed in you' quite yet.) I thought she would run away after class, but she came upstairs for her punishment: completion of a rather well-designed discipline sheet.

What did you do? I do on paper. I drawing.

Why did you do that? Because I'm boring.

Is your behavior good or bad? Why do you think so? bad. Because I didn't do study.

If you do the same thing again, what punishment should you get? I will have another homework make ten sentences.

To your teacher,

To teacher. I'm sorry. Because you will sad. But I'm only playing. Sorry to study. But I'm boring to study for long time. and I did a lie. So next day don't sad at me. I will good at you.

ByeBye
from Sally

Before I forget to remember

As an English teacher and resident of Korea, one sees and hears amusing things pretty much daily. Here's some recent highlights:

Adult student asking what the difference is between 'sheet' and 'sheet' – you know, s-h-e-e-t and s-h-i-t.

Middle school student asking why 'motherfather' is a swear word.

Respectable middle-aged lady wearing a t-shirt that said “I love my hooker”.

Adult student explaining that she thinks drizzle is 'so romantic'. I guess rain has different meanings for different people.

My Korean tutor asking in a text message for my “girl (couple) friend's phone number”.

Two elementary students hiding in a balcony outside the classroom. They climbed through a gap about 8 inches wide to do so. Healthy and Safety?....in Korea? Hmmmm...

And an excellent story from another elementary student. The task was to write about a pirate who loves to knit, but she made it so much more creative than that:

In a ocean there is one ship. The ship, it is pirate ship. But there are very quiet. That time flow out beautiful song in pirate ship. We are surprize and go to nearby the ship. We are suprize one more time! because pirate knit sit on the chair. They see we, they're stand up and say “Welcome to pirate ship!” They bring some food and some drink. One pirate come to me and whisper “Help me please. Chief very love knit, so we're knit too. You convince my chief.”

We're going to the chief room. In room chief knit very beautiful cloth. We say “Why do you love knit?” he answer “It's beautiful” and “It make my hand doesn't steal the other person's thing.” We agree his answer and come out his room. We tell chief's mind. They're agree too so we're leave pirate ship.

Climbing, K-style

After work last night, Lacey and I went to the local climbing gym in Siji for some much needed exercise. We used to go in the mornings (well, lunchtime, but that's morning for us) but schedule changes have made that impossible for the last couple of months. Even though it meant a very delayed dinner, going in the evening meant we actually got to meet some of the local climbers and see them in action. Chubby beer-swillers they are not. Well, maybe not the beer part...

Koreans never do anything by halves. Studying, hiking, golf, drinking, school testing...it seems everything is taken further and faster than back in the slow-moving West. When a Korean likes a sport, they practice All the Time, wear all the Right Gear - and they improve quickly. The studying regime, and drinking habits are well known aspects of modern Korean culture, but they fit into a broader context than I first realised.

So I guess it shouldn't be surprising that every one of the 5 or 6 climbers we saw last night was of a standard far above the average climber at Ibrox. I can't say anything about their rope-work as its a bouldering gym (though one guy was practicing clipping in with a rope tied around his waist) but their strength and all-round athleticism certainly is impressive. It reminded me of a training article by Dave MacLeod where he talks about how a lot of climbers are limited simply by being surrounded by climbers of their same level and so they don't feel the need to push themselves. While I'm nowhere near the peak of fitness, I did find myself pushing harder just by having harder climbers in the same gym, something I rarely did during our quiet morning sessions.

But what about 'traditional climbing' and the philosophy that goes with it? I've accepted that I probably can't continue my apprenticeship in Korea, and I doubt it's something that would even have much meaning here. Nature and wilderness are not revered in the way that they are in the UK, and especially Scotland, so of course the climbing culture is different. While I can't imagine sport-climbing beating the elation of completing a gruelling multi-pitch climb on the Cuillin Ridge, it was a fantastic way to spend a week in El Chorro. And indoor climbing, despite its limitations, undeniably builds fitness and strength.

As we were leaving last night, our new friends told us to come back soon. And drink some beers. While climbing. Oh Korea :)

Got canned heat in my heels tonight

Sometimes it's hard to choose the best moment of the night. Was it dancing like a broken doll to Lady Gaga's opus 'Bad Romance'? Eating vegan chocolate cake with a wickedly creamy filling? Watching Lacey jump around a nearly deserted dancefloor and wondering what ever happened to Jamiroquai? Or sitting on the kerb outside the biggest foreigner bar while all of Daegu's colourful characters came out to play?

Last night was one for the books for sure. Our friend Cat had her 30^th birthday celebration, starting at Daegu's most fabulous French and Mediterranean restaurant, Dijon. Due to budgetary restrictions, Lacey and I were restrained in our ordering, but the food was delicious and the chat was lively. We moved on our favorite home of drinks in bags to start some dancing, which went on for lord knows how long. When we thought we lost everyone, we wandered upstairs and meandered towards another bar and the kebab shop. (Yes, Daegu has a kebab shop now. All the comforts of home.) Then we heard that a dance party with a group of gay guys was underway back at Gogo, and so returned to catch the tail end, and close the bar with whatever music we wanted for the next half hour. Lacey and I were regulars at Gogo when it first opened, and before it got really popular, so it was like old times to take control of the music and dancefloor again.

We then went to sit on the kerb outside Thursday Party: the best spot to watch the madness unfold. We met an Irish girl with her leg in a cast who told us the story of each ankle: the bandaged one was pretty boring, but the other was broken by moonwalking. A smiley Korean guy who just finished his military service sipped water next to us until he'd recovered enough to return inside. A GI joined us for a while, and asked if maybe we would be going back to his hotel, but seemed unperturbed when we declined. And a usually friendly girl threw her beer on a guy who probably deserved it. Eventually it was time to be driven home by a pleasingly sober taxi driver.

Animals in Korea

A while ago, Lacey and I went on a dog walk with the local dog and cat shelter. The experience was both fun, and emotionally draining. We haven't been back, and I'm honestly not sure that I want to - and I say that as someone who loves taking dogs for a walk. One of the things about Korean culture that I just can't accept is the attitude towards animals. I don't know what underlies this way of thinking, nor can I describe it, so I'll just say that I feel a little queasy when my students tell me that 'all animals are dirty'. This weekend, my friend and co-worker, Mark, went on another dog walk. I think he sums it up better than I can.

In other news, my parents will arrive in Daegu tomorrow! I know I never update this, so maybe their arrival will spur me on to write something soon... Hope everyone is having a lovely spring!

Gaysplosion!

When we were about 13, my friends and I started going shopping (without parents!) in Leicester and later, Birmingham. Even though we mostly spent our time in Topshop and Miss Selfridge, the real draw for me was the excitement of being in a bustling, noisy city. Compared to the suburbs, Leicester was a thrilling assault to the senses, and I loved everything about it. As I'm sure most of you know, Leicester and Birmingham are two of the most multi-racial cities in the UK, and both are heading for so-called 'minority-majority' status. So from the very beginning, I thought of cities as melting pots. Years later, when I moved to Edinburgh, I remember being surprised at how white it is: 'sameness' just isn't a word I associate with cities. Unsurprising then, that Glasgow felt more comfortable to me.

Daegu is certainly more like Edinburgh than Glasgow: its a Conservative city, as well as a conservative one. I knew this before I moved here but, like most things I 'knew' before I came to Korea, it took me a long time to actually understand it. Most of the time it's no big deal, and the high concentration of teachers in Siji sometimes masks it, but any visit to Seoul is an immediate reminder of what a truly cosmopolitan city feels like. Rather like the trip to Japan, I'm amazed at how somewhere so foreign can feel so comfortable and normal just by encompassing different cultures. Sometimes all it takes is hearing people speak Arabic, and being able to buy couscous and vegan cookies to feel at home. Oh, and the gay bars help too. I almost forgot about those.

There's an area in Itaewon (the foreigner district of Seoul) known as 'homo hill'. The bars are small, the sound systems suck, and the drinks are overpriced, but there's no denying the fabulousness. While dithering over which bar was best, we were beckoned into one by a giant of a man wearing exquisitely applied make-up. He immediately asked if we were 'lejbian' and informed us that he was 'super bottom'. He then started his own 'booking club'* by getting all the girls to sit together, and telling everyone to talk. Luckily, the Koreans we sat with were very friendly, and one of them was an English teacher so helped translate. The conversation was certainly enlightening for foreigners and Koreans alike about the differences in gay-cultue. They were astounded that all of our famillies knew about us dating girls, while our jaws dropped when our translator told us she was married to a gay man, and hopes to be able to live with her girlfriend 'in a year or three'.

By then, the dancefloor was calling, so we relocated to one of the nightclubs. Koreans don't ever really do 'playing it cool', and they LOVED the music (100% K-pop of course). By the time we left, there really was a gaysplosion outisde: the hill was packed with happy queens of every color. I guess I used to think gay bars were all seedy and meat-market-y, and while I'm sure some of them must be, so far it's been the opposite: the atmosphere is more friendly and welcoming than in most 'straight' bars and clubs.

*'Booking clubs' or 'nightclubs' are bars where men pay for women to sit with them and chat.

What about me? I don't think both are right.

About a month ago I lost one of my favourite classes, and I started a rather sentimental post about them. Then after only a few weeks, I got the class back again, so no need for mawkishness! I will simply say that I am way too maternal about one little girl with awful spelling whose cuteness is just too much to bear. Here's her writing about 'Life on Mars'.

Mark (Mars)

Diray

0/00/0 day

I want to the Mark that people looks like opcatos (octopus). They so kind. They eat same our's food. That city like our's city They just different face. The big mart is F-mart I eat a suger Every people is eat suger or drank water It's so tasty. That is so cold. It's -40C but Mark people is not cold That season is summer thay think It's so hot. because The Mark is far to sun then our's star.

Another student who left a while ago is from the other end of the spectrum in a lot of ways. Roger is an awkward teenager and he's a bit of an odd duck, but he was a great character and his writing was always very creative and interesting. I can't remember the exact assignment for this one - something to do with words that are difficult to define - but some background info is needed. All middle-school students in Korea have the same hair cuts: girls have a chin-length bob and straight cut fringe, and boys have short hair. Short hair for boys seems pretty normal I guess, but the average boyband looks like this:

So the end of elementary school is pretty traumatic for some of the boys and their beloved fringes. I doubt Roger was among them, and he must be used to it as he's in his last year of middle-school, but as usual he had his own unique perspective.

There are many students who want to cut their hairs freely. And, also there are many adults who want to cut student's hair short.

Students think that it should be free to cut their hairs freely. In some schools, students grow their hairs, even the techers gave them punishments. They said 'It's my decision, not teacher's' and, 'Can't I grow my hair? Why? It's my hair, my!'

On the other hand, some adults think that students hair should be neat. They sometimes say bad words to students, also they think students who grow their hairs are bullies, and bad students.

Students define that 'grow hair is free' and adults define that 'student's hair should be neat!' What about me? I don't think both are right. I think they should try to understand each other.